Think about it: you are the person you spend the majority of your time with. Better yet, you are the person you spend ALL of your time with! So rather than berate yourself, doesn’t it make more sense to love yourself? Many of you may be nodding in agreement, others may be thinking, “Well sure, but it’s not that easy.” Valid observation. For the most part, we’ve been conditioned to self-criticize, so loving ourselves becomes a bit of a challenge, doesn’t it? Here are three easy steps to support you on your journey to falling in love with YOU: Begin by meeting someone new and interesting. That person is you, of course, but how often do we stop to look at what’s interesting about ourselves?
So take some time this week to do these things:
1. Meet the interesting person within you. Close your eyes for just two minutes a day and look within — what are you like? What is good about you? What do you like to do, to eat, to play? What music do you like? What are your interests, your passions, your accomplishments? Don’t be critical at this point, find the interesting in you. It’s there, if you look.
2. Get to know this person. It’s possible you don’t know the answers to some of the questions in the previous step. Look at this as a pretty exciting opportunity to find out! Over the next few days (and weeks), explore yourself. Find out what you like, what what you don’t like, what your passions are. Look within and find out your desires, dreams, fears, strengths, weaknesses, and all that’s good within you.
3. Appreciate the little things. You might not be “perfect” but even the little imperfections can be perfect. Start to learn to accept this interesting person, greatness and flaws alike, and appreciate all of it. This might mean putting aside the judgments of yourself, and saying, “This is what makes you … you. And because of that, it is perfect and great.”
By beginning to “retrain” the way you talk to yourself, you begin to radically restore your relationship to self. Choose self-compassion over self-criticism. Have your back regularly. Tune in to how you’re feeling and honor that. And when a harsh thought comes up, choose to disengage it and plant a positive thought instead. If you learned self-judgment it means that you can unlearn it. Begin implementing these steps into your daily routine. After all, you’re the one you have been searching for.