…Enjoy life instead of clinging to it or pushing it away. If you can live like that, each moment will change you. If you are willing to experience the gift of life instead of fighting with it, you will be moved to the depth of your being. When you reach this state, you will begin to see the secrets of the heart.
We have all been there: we are having a great day when suddenly, someone says something we don’t like and just like that, we close off. The day immediately becomes heavy and we become moody. We close down and protect ourselves because we feel we are being threatened. Our major struggles end up being with our inner fears, insecurities, and destructive behavior patterns, and not with outside forces. What do I mean by this?
You know exactly how to close your heart and put up a psychological protective shield. You know exactly how to close down when you begin to experience fear and anxiety. When you close down and protect yourself, you are pulling a shell around the part of you that is weak. This is the part that feels it needs protection even though no physical threat is taking place. You are protecting your ego, your self-concept. If a situation makes you feel fear, insecurity, and other emotional problems, you close off. You feel the need to protect yourself.
The problem is that the part of you that gets disturbed is way out of balance. It’s so sensitive that the slightest little thing causes it to overreact. It’s not healthy. But our society considers psychological sensitivities normal. Because most of us don’t have to worry about food, shelter, or clothing, we have the luxury of worrying about a spot on our pants, or laughing too loud, or saying something wrong. Because we’ve developed this hypersensitive psyche, we constantly use our energies to close around it and protect ourselves. But this process only hides the problems; it doesn’t fix them. You’re locking your illness inside yourself, and it will get worse.
You will get to a point in your growth where you understand that if you protect yourself, you will never be free. It’s that simple. Because you’re scared, you have locked yourself within your house and pulled down all the shades. Now it’s dark and you want to see the sunlight, but you can’t. If you close and protect yourself, you are locking this scared, insecure person within your heart. You will never be free that way.
Ultimately, if you protect yourself perfectly, you will never grow. If you really want to grow, you have to unify yourself. Be self-aware. Everything you see inside is just that: something you recognize within. Don’t waste energy or time analyzing and criticizing it. Right now, many fragmented parts of your psyche are held within you. If you want to be free, it all has to be equally exposed to your awareness and released. But it will never be exposed if you’re closing yourself. After all, the purpose of closing was to make sure that the sensitive parts of your psyche don’t get exposed. So you catch on that no matter how much pain the exposure creates, you are willing to pay that price for freedom. You just go about your business and put your whole being into whatever’s happening, instead of putting your whole being into your personal sensitivity.
Set your eyes on the highest state you can imagine and don’t take them off. If you slip, just get back up. It doesn’t matter. The very fact that you even want to go through this process of freeing the energy flow means you are great. You will get there. Just keep letting go.