The absolute most important experience of our lives is discovering who we really are. Yet, so many of us walk around either not really knowing exactly who that is or listening to an inner critic that gives us harsh and belittling ideas about ourselves. We mistakenly think of self-understanding as self-indulgence, and we carry on without asking the most important question we’ll ever ask: Who am I really?
Finding yourself may sound like an overrated, existential goal, but it is actually a necessary process that is at the root of everything we do in life. In order to be the most valuable person to the world around us—the best partner, parent, friend, etc—we have to first know who we are, what we value and, by extension, what we have to offer. Over the years, I have worked with hundreds of women and men who wondered about who they were, what their passions were, and what their calling could possibly be. From this space of authenticity and vulnerability begins a process that involves breaking down – shedding layers that do not serve us in our lives and don’t reflect who we really are. It also involves a tremendous act of building up – recognizing who we want to be and passionately going about fulfilling our unique destiny – whatever that may be. It’s a matter of recognizing our personal power, yet being open and vulnerable to our experiences. It isn’t something to fear or avoid, berating ourselves along the way, but rather something to seek out with the curiosity and compassion we would have toward a fascinating new friend