In all my years of practice, I have found that the most common struggle is in having a relationship with yourself. I cannot tell you how many clients I’ve seen who found it near impossible to sit still with themselves. Many wanted distractions, addictions, and relationships to keep them distracted from themselves. The truth is that you’re relationship with yourself sets the tone for all other relationships in your life. Here are a few tips for learning how to love you:
1. Be kind to yourself.
You may have hurts, emotional pain, and shortcomings. Learn to accept yourself, shortcomings and all, even if your family and previous partners may have berated you about them. Interrupt self-critical thoughts with compassionate ones. Focus on your many positive qualities. Focus on your strengths, your abilities, and your admirable traits.
2. Give yourself a break.
You’re not perfect. No one is. You don’t have to be at the top of your game every day.
Be willing to embrace your imperfections and excuse your bad days. Don’t set such high standards for yourself emotionally and mentally. It’s normal to feel sadness and pain and to hit some low points in life. Allow yourself to embrace these emotions without judging yourself for them. It comes with being human.
Practice gratefulness on a daily basis. Even if it’s uncomfortable at first. Even if you’re only grateful for your pillow. Start looking for reasons to be grateful.
When you’re grateful for the things you have, no matter how small they may be, you will see those things instantly increase – this is because we attract what we are. And if we are grateful for what we have NOW, we attract more and more reasons to be grateful!